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19. Being thus modestly and soberly trained, and rather made
subject by Thee to her parents, than by her parents to Thee, when
she had arrived at a marriageable age, she was given to a husband whom
she served as her lord. And she busied herself to gain him to Thee,
preaching Thee unto him by her behaviour; by which Thou madest her
fair, and reverently amiable, and admirable unto her husband. For
she so bore the wronging of her bed as never to have any dissension with
her husband on account of it. For she waited for Thy mercy upon him,
that by believing in Thee he might become chaste. And besides this,
as he was earnest in friendship, so was he violent in anger; but she
had learned that an angry husband should not be resisted, neither in
deed, nor even in word. But so soon as he was grown calm and
tranquil, and she saw a fitting moment, she would give him a reason
for her conduct, should he have been excited without cause. In
short, while many matrons, whose husbands were more gentle, carried
the marks of blows on their dishonoured faces, and would in private
conversation blame the lives of their husbands, she would blame their
tongues, monishing them gravely, as if in jest: "That from the hour
they heard what are called the matrimonial tablets read to them, they
should think of them as instruments whereby they were made servants;
so, being always mindful of their condition, they ought :not to set
themselves in opposition to their lords." And when they, knowing
what a furious husband she endured, marvelled that it had never been
reported, nor appeared by any indication, that Patricius had beaten
his wife, or that there had been any domestic strife between them,
even for a day, and asked her in confidence the reason of this, she
taught them her rule, which I have mentioned above. They who
observed it experienced the wisdom of it, and rejoiced; those who
observed it not were kept in subjection, and suffered.
20. Her mother-in-law, also, being at first prejudiced against
her by the whisperings of evil-disposed servants, she so conquered by
submission, persevering in it with patience and meekness, that she
voluntarily disclosed to her son the tongues of the meddling servants,
whereby the domestic peace between herself and her daughter-in-law had
been agitated, begging him to punish them for it. When, therefore,
he had in conformity with his mother's wish, and with a view to the
discipline of his family, and to ensure the future harmony of its
members corrected with stripes those discovered, according to the
will of her who had discovered them, she promised a similar reward to
any who, to please her, should say anything evil to her of her
daughter-in-law. And, none now daring to do so, they lived
together with a wonderful sweetness of mutual good-will.
21. This great gift Thou bestowedst also, my God, my mercy,
upon that good handmaid of Thine, out of whose womb Thou createdst
me, even that, whenever she could, she showed herself such a
peacemaker between any differing and discordant spirits, that when she
had heard on both sides most bitter things, such as swelling and
undigested discord is wont to give vent to, when the crudities of
enmities are breathed out in bitter speeches to a present friend against
an absent enemy, she would disclose nothing about the one unto the
other, save what might avail to their reconcilement. A small good
this might seem to me, did I not know to my sorrow countless persons,
who, through some horrible and far-spreading infection of sin, not
only disclose to enemies mutually enraged the things said in passion
against each other, but add some things that were never spoken at all;
whereas, to a generous man, it ought to seem a small thing not to
incite or increase the enmities of men by ill-speaking, unless he
endeavour likewise by kind words to extinguish them. Such a one was
she, Thou, her most intimate Instructor, teaching her in the
school of her heart.
22. Finally, her own husband, now towards the end of his earthly
existence, did she gain over unto Thee; and she had not to complain
of that in him, as one of the faithful, which, before he became so,
she had endured. She was also the servant of Thy servants.
Whosoever of them knew her, did in her much magnify, honour, and
love Thee; for that through the testimony of the fruits of a holy
conversation, they perceived Thee to be present in her heart. For
she had "been the wife of one man," had requited her parents, had
guided her house piously, was "well-reported of for good works,"
had "brought up children," x as often travailing in birth of them as
she saw them swerving from Thee. Lastly, to all of us, O Lord
(since of Thy favour Thou sufferest Thy! servants to speak),
who, before her sleeping in' Thee,a lived associated together,
having received the grace of Thy baptism, did she devote, care such
as she might if she had been mother of us all; served us as if she had
been child of all.
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