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1. DURING this space of nine years, then, from my nineteenth
to my eight and twentieth year, we went on seduced and seducing,
deceived and deceiving, in divers lusts; publicly, by sciences which
they style "liberal" secretly, with a falsity called religion.
Here proud, there superstitious, everywhere vain! Here, striving
after the emptiness of popular fame, even to theatrical applauses, and
poetic contests, and strifes for grassy garlands, and the follies of
shows and the intemperance of desire. There, seeking to be purged
from these our corruptions by carrying food to those who were called
"elect" and "holy," out of which, in the laboratory of their
stomachs, they should] make for us angels and gods, by whom we;
might be delivered. These things did I follow eagerly, and practise
with my friends by me and with me deceived. Let the arrogant,
and such as have not been yet savingly cast] down and stricken by
Thee, O my God, laugh at me; but notwithstanding I would confess
to Thee mine own shame in Thy praise. Bear with me, I beseech
Thee, and give me grace to retrace in my present remembrance the
circlings of my past errors, and to "offer to Thee the sacrifice of
thanksgiving." For what am I to myself without Thee, but a guide
to mine own downfall? Or what am I even at the best, but one sucking
Thy milk? and feeding upon Thee, the meat that perisheth not? But
what kind of man is any man, seeing that he is but a man? Let,
then, the strong and the mighty laugh at us, but let us who are "poor
and needy" confess unto Thee.
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