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11. Hearken, O God! Alas for the sins of men! Man saith
this, and Thou dst compassionate him; for Thou didst create him,
but didst not create the sin that is in him. Who bringeth to my
remembrance the sin of my infancy? For before Thee none is free from
sin, not even the infant which has lived but a day upon the earth.
Who bringeth this to my remembrance? Doth not each little one, in
whom I behold that which I do not remember of myself? In what,
then, did I sin? Is it that I cried for the breast? If I should
now so cry, not indeed for the breast, but for the food suitable
to my years, I should be most justly laughed at and rebuked.
What I then did de served rebuke; but as I could not understand
those who rebuked me, neither custom nor reason suffered me to be
rebuked. For as we grow we root out and cast from us such habits.
I, have not seen any one who is wise, when "purging" anything cast
away the good. Or was it good, even for a time, to strive to get by
crying that which, if given, would be hurtful to be bitterly
indignant that those who were free and its elders, and those to whom it
owed its being, besides many others wiser than it, who would not give
way to the nod of its good pleasure, were not subject unto it to
endeavour to harm, by struggling as much as it could, because those
commands were not obeyed which only could have been obeyed to its hurt?
Then, in the weakness of the infant's limbs, and not in its will,
lies its innocency. I myself have seen and known an infant to be
jealous though it could not speak. It became pale, and cast bitter
looks on its foster-brother. Who is ignorant of this? Mothers and
nurses tell us that they appease these things by I know not what
remedies; and may this be taken for innocence, that when the fountain
of milk is flowing fresh and abundant, one who has need should not be
allowed to share it, though needing that nourishment to sustain life?
Yet we look leniently on these things, not because they are not
faults, nor because the faults are small, but because they will vanish
as age increases. For although you may allow these things now, you
could not bear them with equanimity if found in an older person.
12. Thou, therefore, O Lord my God, who avest life to the
infant, and a frame which, as we see, Thou hast endowed with
senses, compacted with limbs, beautified with form, and, for its
general good and safety, hast introduced all vital energies -Thou
commandest me to [praise Thee for these things, "to give thanks
[unto the Lord, and to sing praise unto Thy name, O Most
High;" for Thou art a God omnipotent and good, though Thou hadst
done nought but these things, which none other can do but Thou, who
alone madest all things, O Thou most fair, who madest all things
fair, and orderest all according to Thy law. This period, then, of
my life, O Lord, of which I have no remembrance, which I believe
on the word of others, and which I guess from other infants, it
chagrins me true though the guess be to reckon in this life of
mine which I lead in this world; inasmuch as, in the darkness of my
forgetfulness, it is like to that which I passed in my mother's
womb. But if "I was shapen in iniquity, and in sin did my mother
conceive me, " x where, I pray thee, O my God, where, Lord,
or when was I, Thy servant, innocent? But behold, I pass by that
time, for what have I to do with that, the memories of which I
cannot recall?
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