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OF these three calls then, although the two former may seem to rest on
better principles, yet sometimes we find that even by the third grade,
which seems the lowest and the coldest, men have been made perfect and most
earnest in spirit, and have become like those who made an admirable
beginning in approaching the Lord's service, and passed the rest of their
lives also in most laudable fervour of spirit: and again we find that from
the higher grade very many have grown cold, and often have come to a
miserable end. And just as it was no hindrance to the former class that
they seemed to be converted not of their own free will, but by force and
compulsion, in as much as the loving kindness of the Lord secured for them
the opportunity for repentance, so too to the latter it was of no avail
that the early days of their conversion were so bright, because they were
not careful to bring the remainder of their life to a suitable end. For in
the case of Abbot Moses, who lived in a spot in the wilderness called
Calamus, nothing was wanting to his merits and perfect bliss, in
consequence of the fact that he was driven to flee to the monastery through
fear of death, which was hanging over him because of a murder; for he made
such use of his compulsory conversion that with ready zeal he turned it
into a voluntary one and climbed the topmost heights of perfection. As also
on the Other hand; to very many, whose names I ought not to mention, it has
been of no avail that they entered on the Lord's service with better
beginning than this, as afterwards sloth and hardness of heart crept over
them, and they fell into a dangerous state of torpor, and the bottomless
pit of death, an instance of which we see clearly indicated in the call of
the Apostles. For of what good was it to Judas that he had of his own free
will embraced the highest grade of the Apostolate in the same way in which
Peter and the rest of the Apostles had been summoned, as he allowed the
splendid beginning of his call to terminate in a ruinous end of cupidity
and covetousness, and as a cruel murderer even rushed into the betrayal of
the Lord? Or what hindrance was it to Paul that he was suddenly blinded,
and seemed to be drawn against his will into the way of salvation, as
afterwards he followed the Lord with complete fervour of soul, and having
begun by compulsion completed it by a free and voluntary devotion, and
terminated with a magnificent end a life that was rendered glorious by such
great deeds? Everything therefore depends upon the end; in which one who
was consecrated by a noble conversion at the outset may through
carelessness turn out a failure, and one who was compelled by necessity to
adopt the monastic life may through fear of God and earnestness be made
perfect.
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