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EPHESIANS vi. 1-3.
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord,
for this is right. Honor thy father and mother
(which is the first commandment with promise),
that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest
live long on the earth."
As a man in forming a body, places the head
first, after that the neck, then the feet, so
does the blessed Paul proceed in his discourse.
He has spoken of the husband, he has spoken of
the wife, who is second in authority, he now
goes on by gradual advances to the third
rank-which is that of children. For the
husband has authority over the wife, and the
husband and the wife over the children. Now
then mark what he is saying.
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord;
for this is the first commandment with
promise."
Here he has not a word of discourse concerning
Christ, not a word on high subjects, for he is
as yet addressing his discourse to tender
understandings. And it is for this reason,
moreover, that he makes his exhortation short,
inasmuch as children cannot follow up a long
argument. For this reason also he does not
discourse at all about a kingdom, (because it
does not belong to the tender age of childhood to
understand these subjects,) but what a child's
soul most especially longs to hear, that he
says, namely, that it shall "live long."
For if any one shall enquire why it is that he
omitted to discourse concerning a kingdom, but
set before them the commandment laid down in the
law, he does this because he speaks to them as
infantile, and because he is well aware that if
the husband and the wife are thus disposed
according to the law which he has laid down,
there will be but little trouble in securing the
submission of the children. For whenever any
matter has a good and sound and orderly principle
and foundation, everything will thenceforward go
on with method and regularity, with much
facility: the more difficult thing is to settle
the foundation, to lay down a firm basis.
"Children," saith he, "obey your parents in
the Lord," that is, according to the Lord.
This, he means to say, is what God commands
you. But what then if they shall command
foolish things? Generally a father, however
foolish he may be himself, does not command
foolish things. However, even in that case,
the Apostle has guarded the matter, by saying,
"in the Lord"; that is, wherever you will
not be offending against God. So that if the
father be a gentile or a heretic, we ought no
longer to obey, because the command is not
then, "in the Lord." But how is it that he
says, "Which is the first commandment"? For
the first is, "Thou shalt not commit
adultery;-Thou shalt not kill." He does
not speak of it then as first in rank, but in
respect of the promise. For upon those others
there is no reward annexed, as being enacted
with reference to evil things, and to departure
from evil things. Whereas in these others,
where there is the practice of good, there is
further a promise held out. And observe how
admirable a foundation he has laid for the path
of virtue, that is, honor and reverence towards
parents. When he would lead us away from wicked
practices, and is just about to enter upon
virtuous ones, this is the first thing he
enjoins, honor towards parents; inasmuch as
they before all others are, after God, the
authors of our being, so that it is reasonable
they should be the first to reap the fruits of
our right actions; and then all the rest of
mankind. For if a man have not this honor for
parents he will never be gentle toward those
unconnected with him.
However, having given the necessary injunctions
to children, he passes to the fathers, and
says, Ver. 4. "And ye fathers, provoke
not your children to wrath; but nurture them up
in the chastening and admonition of the Lord."
He does not say, "love them," because to
this nature draws them even against their own
will, and it were superfluous to lay down a law
on such subjects. But what does he say?
"Provoke not your children to wrath," as many
do by disinheriting them, and disowning them,
and treating them overbearingly, not as free,
but as slaves. This is why he says, "Provoke
not your children to wrath." Then, which is
the chief thing of all, he shows how they will
be led to obedience, referring the whole source
of it to the head and chief authority. And in
the same way as he has shown the husband to be
the cause of the wife's obedience, (which is
the reason also why he addresses the greater part
of his arguments to him, advising him to attach
her to himself by the power of love,) so, I
say, here also, he refers the efficiency to
him, by saying, "But bring them up in the
chastening and admonition of the Lord." Thou
seest that where there are spiritual ties, the
natural ties will follow. Do you wish your son
to be obedient? From the very first "Bring
him up in the chastening and admonition of the
Lord." Never deem it an unnecessary thing
that he should be a diligent hearer of the divine
Scriptures. For there the first thing he hears
will be this, "Honor thy father and thy
mother"; so that this makes for thee. Never
say, this is the business of monks. Am I
making a monk of him? No. There is no need he
should become a monk. Why be so afraid of a
thing so replete with so much advantage? Make
him a Christian. For it is of all things
necessary for laymen to be acquainted with the
lessons derived from this source; but especially
for children. For theirs is an age full of
folly; and to this folly are super added the bad
examples derived from the heathen tales, where
they are made acquainted with those heroes so
admired amongst them, slaves of their passions,
and cowards with regard to death; as, for
example, Achilles, when he relents, when he
dies for his concubine, when another gets
drunk, and many other things of the sort. He
requires therefore the remedies against these
things. How is it not absurd to send children
out to trades, and to school, and to do all you
can for these objects, and yet, not to "bring
them up in the chastening and admonition of the
Lord "? And for this reason truly we are the
first to reap the fruits, because we bring up
our children to be insolent and profligate,
disobedient, and mere vulgar fellows. Let us
not then do this; no, let us listen to this
blessed Apostle's admonition. "Let us bring
them up in the chastening and admonition of the
Lord." Let us give them a pattern. Let us
make them from the earliest age apply themselves
to the reading of the Scriptures. Alas, that
so constantly as I repeat this, I am looked
upon as trifling! Still, I shall not cease to
do my duty. Why, tell me, do ye not imitate
them of old? Ye women, especially, emulate
those admirable women. Has a child been born to
any one? Imitate Hannah's example (1 Sam.
i. 24); look at what she did. She brought
him up at once to the temple. Who amongst you
would not rather that his son should become a
Samuel than that he should be king of the whole
world ten thousand times over? "And how,"
you will say, "is it possible he should become
such a one?" Why is it not possible? It is
because thou dost not choose it thyself, nor
committest him to the care of those who are able
to make him such a one. "And who," it will
be said, "is such a one as this?" God.
Since she put him into the hands of God. For
not even Eli himself was one of those in any
great degree qualified to form him; (how could
he be, he who was not able to form even his own
children?) No, it was the faith of the mother
and her earnest zeal that wrought the whole. He
was her first child, and her only one, and she
knew not whether she should ever have others
besides. Yet she did not say, "I will wait
till the child is grown up, that he may have a
taste of the things of this life, I will allow
him to have his pastime in them a little in his
childish years." No, all these thoughts the
woman repudiated, she was absorbed in one
object, how from the very beginning she might
dedicate the spiritual image to God. Well may
we men be put to the blush at the wisdom of this
woman. She offered him up to God, and there
she left him. And therefore was her married
state more glorious, in that she had made
spiritual objects her first care, in that she
dedicated the first-fruits to God. Therefore
was her womb fruitful, and she obtained other
children besides. And therefore she saw him
honorable even in. the world. For if men when
they are honored, render honor in return, will
not God much more, He who does this, even
without being honored? How long are we to be
mere lumps of flesh? How long are we to be
stooping to the earth? Let everything be
secondary with us to the provident care we should
take of our children, and to our "bringing them
up in the chastening and admonition of the
Lord." If from the very first he is taught to
be a lover of true wisdom, then wealth greater
than all wealth has he acquired and a more
imposing name. You will effect nothing so great
by teaching him an art, and giving him that
outward learning by which he will gain riches,
as if you teach him the art of despising riches.
If you desire to make him rich, do this. For
the rich man is not he who desires great riches,
and is encircled with great riches; but the man
who has need of nothing. Discipline your son in
this, teach him this.
This is the greatest riches. Seek not how to
give him reputation and high character in outward
learning, but consider deeply how you shall
teach him to despise the glory that belongs to
this present life. By this means would he
become more distinguished and more truly
glorious. This it is possible for the poor man
and the rich man alike to accomplish. These are
lessons which a man does not learn from a
master, nor by art, but by means of the divine
oracles. Seek not how he shall enjoy a long
life here, but how he shall enjoy a boundless
and endless life hereafter. Give him the great
things, not the little things. Hear what Paul
saith, "Bring them up in the chastening and
admonition of the Lord "; study not to make
him an orator, but train him up to be a
philosopher. In the want of the one there will
be no harm whatever; in the absence of the
other, all the rhetoric in the world will be of
no advantage. Tempers are wanted, not
talking; character, not cleverness; deeds,
not words. These gain a man the kingdom.
These confer what are benefits indeed. Whet
not his tongue, but cleanse his soul. I do not
say this to prevent your teaching him these
things, but to prevent your attending to them
exclusively. Do not imagine that the monk alone
stands in need of these lessons from Scripture.
Of all others, the children just about to enter
into the world specially need them. For just in
the same way as the man who is always at anchor
in harbor, is not the man who requires his ship
to be fitted out and who needs a pilot and a
crew, but he who is always out at sea; so is it
with the man of the world and the monk. The one
is entered as it were into a waveless harbor,
and lives an untroubled life, and far removed
from every storm; whilst the other is ever on
the ocean, and lives out at sea in the very
midst of the ocean, battling with billows
without number.
And though he may not need it himself, still he
ought to be so prepared as to stop the mouths of
others. Thus the more distinguished he is in
the present life, so much the more he stands in
need of this education. If he passes his life
in courts, there are many Heathens, and
philosophers, and persons puffed up with the
glory of this life. It is like a place full of
dropsical people. Such in some sort is the
court. All are, as it were, puffed up, and
in a state of inflammation. And they who are
not so are studying to become so. Now then
reflect how vast a benefit it is, that your son
on entering there, should enter like an
excellent physician, furnished with instruments
which may allay every one's peculiar
inflammation, and should go up to every one,
and converse with him, and restore the diseased
body to health, applying the remedies derived
from the Scriptures, and pouring forth
discourses of the true philosophy. For with
whom is the recluse to converse? with his wall
and his ceiling? yea, or again with the
wilderness and the woods? or with the birds and
the trees? He therefore has not so great need
of this sort of discipline. Still, however,
he makes it his business to perfect this work,
not so much with a view of disciplining others as
himself. There is then every need of much
discipline of this sort to those that are to mix
in the present world, because such an one has a
stronger temptation to sin than the other. And
if you have a mind to understand it, he will
further be a more useful person even in the world
itself. For all will have a reverence for him
from these words, when they see him in the fire
without being burnt, and not desirous of power.
But power he will then obtain, when he least
desires it, and will be a still higher object of
respect to the king; for it is not possible that
such a character should be hid. Amongst a
number of healthy persons, indeed, a healthy
man will not be noticed; but when there is one
healthy man amongst a number of sick, the report
will quickly spread and reach the king's ears,
and he will make him ruler over many nations.
Knowing then these things, "bring up your
children in the chastening and admonition of the
Lord."
"But suppose a man is poor." Still he will
be in no wise more insignificant than the man who
lives in kings' courts, because he is not in
kings' courts; no, he will be held in
admiration, and will soon gain that authority
which is yielded voluntarily, and not by any
compulsion. For if a set of Greeks, men
worthless as they are, and dogs, by taking up
that worthless philosophy of theirs, (for such
the Grecian philosophy is,) or rather not
itself but only its mere name, and wearing the
threadbare cloak, and letting their hair grow,
impress many; how much more will he who is a
true philosopher? If a false appearance, if a
mere shadow of philosophy at first sight so
catches us, what if we should love the true and
pure philosophy? Will not all court it, and
entrust both houses, and wives, and children,
with full confidence to such men? But there is
not, no, there is not such a philosopher
existing now. And therefore, it is not
possible to find an example of the sort.
Amongst recluses, indeed, there are such, but
amongst people in the world no longer. And that
amongst recluses there are such, it would be
possible to adduce a number of instances.
However, I will mention one out of many. Ye
know, doubtless, and have heard of, and some,
perhaps, have also seen, the man. whom I am
now about to mention. I mean, the admirable
Julian. This man was a rustic, in humble
life, and of humble parentage, and totally
uninstructed in all outward accomplishments, but
full of unadorned wisdom. When he came into the
cities, (and this was but rarely,) never did
such a concourse take place, not when orators,
or sophists, or any one else rode in. But what
am I saying? Is not his very name more
glorious than that of any king's, and
celebrated even to this day? And if these
things were in this world, in the world in which
the Lord promised us no one good thing, in
which He hath told us we are strangers, let us
consider how great will be the blessings laid up
for us in the heavens. If, where they were
sojourners they enjoyed so great honor, how
great glory shall they enjoy where their own city
is! If, where He promised tribulation, they
meet with such attentive care, then where He
promises true honors, how great shall be their
rest!
And now would ye have me exhibit examples of
secular men? At present, indeed, we have
none; still there are perhaps even secular men
who are excellent, though not arrived at the
highest philosophy. I shall therefore quote you
examples from the saints of the ancient times.
How many, who had wives to keep and children to
bring up, were inferior in no respect, no, in
no respect to those who have been mentioned?
Now, however, it is no longer so, "by reason
of the present distress" (1 Cor. vii.
26), as this blessed Apostle saith. Now
then whom would ye have me mention? Noah, or
Abraham? The son of the one or of the other?
Or again, Joseph? Or would ye have me go to
the Prophets? Moses I mean, or Isaiah?
However, if you will, let us carry our
discourse to Abraham, whom all are continually
bringing forward to us above all others. Had he
not a wife? Had he not children? Yes, for I
too use the same language to you, as you do to
me. He had a wife, but it was not because he
had a wife that he was so remarkable. He had
riches, but it was not because he had riches
that he pleased God. He begat children, but
it was not because he begat children that he was
pronounced blessed. He had three hundred and
eighteen servants born in his house, but it was
not on this account that he was accounted
wonderful. But would you know why it was? It
was for his hospitality, for his contempt of
riches, for his chastened conduct. For what,
tell me, is the duty of a philosopher? Is it
not to despise both riches and glory? Is it not
to be above both envy and every other passion?
Come now then, let us bring him forward and
strip him, and show you what a philosopher he
was. First of all, he esteemed his fatherland
as nothing. God said, "Get thee out of thy
country, and from thy kindred" (Gen. xii.
1), and immediately he went forth. He was
not bound to his house, (or surely he would
never have gone forth,) nor to his love of
familiar friends, nor to anything else
whatever. But what? glory and money he
despised above all others. For when he had put
an end to war by turning the enemy to flight,
and was requested to take the spoil, he rejected
it. (Gen. xiv. 21-23.)
Again, the son of this great man was
reverenced, not because of his riches, but for
his hospitality: not because of his children,
but for his obedience: not because of his wife,
but for the barrenness inflicted on his wife.
(Gen. XXV. 21.)
They looked upon the present life as nothing,
they followed not after gain, they despised all
things. Tell me, which sort of plants are the
best? Are not those which have their strength
from themselves and are injured neither by
rains, nor by hailstorms, nor by gusts of
wind, nor by any other vicissitude of the sort,
but stand naked in defiance of them all, and
needing neither wall nor fence to protect them?
Such is the true philosopher, such is that
wealth of which we spoke. He has nothing, and
has all things: he has all things, and has
nothing. For a fence is not within, but only
without; a wall is not a thing of nature, but
only built round from without. And what again,
I ask, what sort of body is a strong one? Is
it not that which is in health, and which is
overcome neither by hunger nor repletion, nor by
cold, nor by heat; or is it that which in view
of all these things, needs both caterers, and
weavers, and hunters, and physicians, to give
it health? He is the rich man, the true
philosopher, who needeth none of these things.
For this cause it was that this blessed Apostle
said, "Bring them up in the chastening and
admonition of the Lord." Surround them not
with outward defenses. For such is wealth,
such is glory; for when these fall, and they do
fall, the plant stands naked and defenseless,
not only having derived no profit from them
during the time past, but even injury. For
those very shelters that prevented its being
inured to the attacks of the winds, will now
have prepared it for perishing all at once. And
so wealth is injurious rather, because it
renders us undisciplined for the vicissitudes of
life. Let us therefore train up our children to
be such, that they shall be able to bear up
against every trial, and not be surprised at
what may come upon them; "let us bring them up
in the chastening and admonition of the Lord."
And great will be the reward which will be thus
laid up in store for us. For if men for making
statues and painting portraits of kings enjoy so
great honor, shall not we who adorn the image of
the King of kings, (for man is the image of
God,) receive ten thousand blessings, if we
effect a true likeness? For the likeness is in
this, in the virtue of the soul, when we train
our children to be good, to be meek, to be
forgiving, (because all these are attributes of
God,) to be beneficent, to be humane; when
we train them to regard the present world as
nothing. Let this then be our task, to mold
and to direct both ourselves and them according
to what is right. Otherwise with what sort of
boldness shall we stand before the judgment-seat
of Christ? If a man who has unruly children is
unworthy to be a Bishop (Tit. i. 6), much
more is he unworthy of the kingdom of Heaven.
What sayest thou? If we have an unruly wife,
or unruly children, shall we have to render
account? Yes, we shall, if we do not with
exactness bring in that which is due from
ourselves; for our own individual virtue is not
enough in order to salvation. If the man who
laid aside the one talent gained nothing, but
was punished even in such a manner, it is plain
that one's own individual virtue is not enough
in order to salvation, but there is need of that
of another also. Let us therefore entertain
great solicitude for our wives, and take great
care of our children, and of our servants, and
of ourselves. And in our government both of
ourselves and of them, let us beseech God that
He aid us in the work. If He shall see us
interested in this work, and solicitous about
it, He will aid us; but if He shall see us
paying no regard to it, He will not give us
His hand. For He does not vouchsafe us His
assistance when we sleep, but when we labor also
ourselves. For a helper, (as the name
implies,) is not a helper of one that is
inactive, but of one who works also himself.
But the good God is able of Himself to bring
the work to perfection, that we may be all
counted worthy to attain to the blessings
promised us, through the grace and compassions
of His only begotten Son, with Whom together
with the Holy Ghost be unto the Father,
glory, might, and honor, now and ever, and
throughout all ages. Amen.
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